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"Oblocks"
to Living Out Your Dreams
by Stacey Mayo
a.k.a. "The Dream Queen"
What stops you from living
out your dreams? Over the years, I have coached thousands of people
in living out their dreams and have heard at least as many reasons
why people don't believe they can make them happen. I have nicknamed
these challenges "Oblocks" - obstacles that block us and
occur as so large that we can't see our way around them.
Many times the obstacles
to living out your dreams seem larger than the dream itself. When
you focus on these obstacles; that is all you can see. They get
larger and larger and take up a greater portion of your mental capacity.
Let me give you a simple example. Jim and Mary are riding their
bicycles to school and they spot a loose brick in the road. Jim
sees the brick and wants to avoid it but he fails to see an on-going
car, swerves and hits the brick and takes a tumble. Mary notices
the brick, continues to focus on where she is going, bypasses the
brick, and goes onward to her destination. And so it goes for living
out your dreams. When you focus on obstacles such as fear of failure
or lack of expertise, they will paralyze you. When you focus on
your vision, you can brainstorm ways to go past the obstacle and
move toward your vision.
Here are some of the
more common Oblocks that stop people. Which ones resonate with you?
Marital status or age:
1. I am single and have to depend on myself
2. I am married and have to support my family
3. I'm too old; maybe if I were younger
Lack of expertise, credibility,
belief in self:
4. I don't know how
5. I'm not an expert in that
6. Who am I to do something like that?
7. I'm not smart enough
8. I am not talented enough
9. "It's" not out there
Financial, time, scarcity:
10. I can't do it now; I'll wait until I retire
11. I'll do it when I make big bucks
12. I can't make money doing that
13. I'll lose my insurance and other benefits
14. I don't have enough money to do that
15. There's not enough time
16. It will take too long
17. I am not vested in my retirement fund yet
Approval from others:
17. People will think I'm crazy
18. My family won't understand
19. "They" won't let me
Fear of success:
20. Others will be jealous of my success.
21. They'll get mad at me.
22. I'll lose my friends
Fear of failure or pain
23. I've tried before and failed
24. What if this isn't it?
25. I might get hurt.
26. What if I fail?
Most of these statements
are directly related to our fears. Many are scarcity-related conversations.
When we live in these fears and disempowering beliefs, those are
exactly what we get. When we believe our dreams are possible, then
they are. The trick is to believe in your dream, take action and
allow it to unfold.
* Visualize what it is
you want to have happen.
* Imagine it as if it already has.
* Script it out and write
the story as if it already happened and make it as exciting and
fantastic as possible.
* Notice the kinds of
questions you are asking yourself. Do they help you move forward
or keep you stuck? Ask yourself, "What is one small thing can
I do to move forward to making this dream a reality?"
* Notice what you are
inspired to do and do it.
* Take one day at a time
and continue to ask yourself, "what is one thing I can do to
move forward today?"
Article by Stacey
Mayo. Stacey Mayo founded the Center for Balanced Living in 1995
as a vehicle for carrying out her life's work and has since supported
thousands of people in making their dreams come true. She is author
of "I Can't Believe I Get Paid To Do This! ": Remarkable
People Reveal 26 Proven Strategies for Making Your Dreams a Reality.
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